arbiyanti

Romance Scam

I personally don’t want to share this romance-scam experience in my blog, but I don’t see any reason why I should keep it to myself. So let’s begin this journey of finding the so-called-romance (via dating website).

It was end of March when this guy (initial H) sent me message and said the typical introduction: he just read my profile and want to know me better. I answered by saying that his profile didn’t say much about him, so I want to know him a little. He said he’s a Turkish-American working in WHO-Europe and was stationed in England. He mentioned quite a bit about himself in the message and asked for my number to have better communication. I didn’t give him my number, instead I asked his, just to make sure that he’s legit and found that his WA-Number with profile picture. So far, quite positive.

He texted me through WhatsApp on April 1st and things went smoothly when we texted back and forth. He asked for my latest pic and I asked his. He sent me pics of him and his family and friends. One day he WA-called and we talked about several minutes. Things were going actually well, we talked and shared about our hopes and everything. The call was somehow delayed perhaps due to the network, so eventually we shared voice-note via WA more often. In some occasion, I told him that I was pretty blunt about taking things serious with this dating-website and trying to figure out if we were on the same page or not. His answers were like picture perfect. He explained me how he’d seen himself building family and taking care of wife and children of his, he would treasure the life that he made with his family and make sure to be a good Imam. He was smooth alright, and to boost his ego.. I even told him that I couldn’t have asked for better answers than his. By far, he was quite convincing.

Mid April, he said that he was on a project that would allow him to visit Indonesia. Talk about fast, huh. I didn’t pay all that serious though, because it would probably just some wishful thinking. So whenever he mentioned about seeing me soon, I typed back and said: don’t keep me waiting too long.

Our calls got pretty intense by late April where he would check up on me during his lunch break and I was on my way home. We made sure to have regular communication, he would ask how my day was and he told me about his day. With all the attention he’d given me, I barely register anything suspicious about him.

By May 10th, he called me and talking like million miles in a minute letting me know that his project was finalized and to secure the deal, he would fly to Kuala Lumpur for contract signing and will visit me immediately after his contract deal is finish. I was still stunned to listen his explanation and was out of my trance when he mentioned that on May 15th he would come to Indonesia for a week. Say what?!

I was nervous as hell and couldn’t believe how fast and how real all this could be. I was like in a whirlwind. I told him that I could plan ahead for 3-days leave from my work during his visit. He updated me with his flight detail, all was very convincing complete with the flight number and time plan. He even sent me picture when he was packing his luggage and sending me voice-note when he checked-in his luggage at London Heathrow airport, all complete with the hectic backsound.

Sunday, May 13th there was a WA-call from Malaysian number and I was surprised to see the profile picture was this H-guy. I accepted the call and apparently he just bought Malaysian number in order to make decent communication. He sent me real-time pictures of him doing chocolate-shopping for me.

Just to give you a little bit perspective here, I’m not actually jumping ecstatic to have him around. I was actually still on confused-mode so I only share discreet information to my family member and to only very few friends. Although this H-guy asked me to book hotel near my home, I wouldn’t want to do it unless he’s standing right before me. So I made no hotel reservation and anyway my leave from work was not to be confirmed from my boss. Even if anything happened and he didn’t make it to Indonesia, I had nothing to lose at all.

D-date, May 15th, I WA-called him and asked what time will he be arrived. He said he was still doing legal work for the contract and eventually out of nowhere the money-talk came out! I probably have serious hearing problem because he said something about sending him USD 1000. I immediately say NO and he started to question my trust. I wanted to say to his face that trust has nothing to do with money! But he was constantly cutting me off by asking me whether I trusted him or not. I gave him few seconds of silence before I said: “Yes, I trust you. Do you have any other questions to be asked?” and with that.. he hung up on me! What the …??!!!

Minutes after, his WA profile-picture both UK and Malaysian number were off and poof.. just like that.. he’s out of my life. Well.. not that he ever entered my life anyway. Haha.

I can’t say that I’m hurt, because all this episode was like surreal. I’m glad that I didn’t fall to his trap or like flying on cloud nine when he said all that lovey-dovey and romantic thing to me. I actually googled his UK number and seriously on the hunt to find if the number was known to be scam or fraud number. My search brought me to this particular website reporting that the exact UK-number did same MO to a girl and gave decent warning to be cautious when the number call.

I may be sorry to have wasted my time indulging text and calls with him. But if he were to be true, he could have been a good guy to be with. Unfortunately, he’s not. He was just another history. And scammer!

This is a fair warning..

Gentleman, it’s not nice to woo a woman and make believe that love is the ultimate goal when all there is from the beginning is just another scam. It’s not nice to give romantic hope for a woman who is not hopeless romantic at all.

Ladies, let’s just trust our insting and dare to say NO when something doesn’t seem to be alright. Remember……. you have been warned!

Jakarta, 27.05.2018

PS: Even if I have yet to find my compatible partner, I’m not one of those who break down and cry. As my colleague said: plenty of fish in the sea! Oo but I’m not looking for fish! I’m looking for an honest man who can make an honest woman out of me :)

4 thoughts on “Romance Scam

    1. arbiyanti Post author

      yeah, never thought that this scam thing still exist. i don’t think scammer would use same name but perhaps same MO. this guy claimed to be pious muslim and can really charm woman with his words and attention he’s given. i hope your friend didn’t fall to his trap and wire money to the scammer!

        1. arbiyanti Post author

          Oo, that’s quite rare.. poetry group. We could never know for sure their intention in getting to know us, because most of the scammers are very excellent in manipulating or in convincing. One thing I learned is.. never ever wire money to strangers.

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